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Tina meditation phallus worship

phallus worship

NEW WOMAN – ME!  no 17

every time again confused spirals of thought
from a complacent church leadership
collide ferociously against my indignant soul
deeming themselves infallible and showing no scruples
this leadership announces God’s predilection for the male
for a male ‘God – He – has created like himself’

my fantasy and my feeling of wounded self-respect created an image
— in analogy to the biblical golden calf —
of the pope devoutly kneeling before the gilded phallus

as counter pole I see my own experience of God
it rehabilitates my relationship to ‘God–with-us’
in creative freedom I picture to myself from biblical texts
how God shows Herself present
hidden in plain day light
as a column of cloud
as a column of fire in the darkness of night

© Tina van Lieshout
translation John Wijngaards

—

MEDITATIONS

  • the face of time

  • I accuse woman

  • past present future

  • phallus worship

  • my dream

—

Tina van Lieshout was a Dutch Catholic woman who felt called to the priesthood. Her diocese refused her admission to the priestly formation programme which she challenged in a high-profile court case. She lost. Being both a gifted artist and poet, she described her despair in a series of paintings and meditations. But she also expressed through them her determination to realise her potential as a free and equal person  Her work was published in the Dutch book Ook in de Naam van de Moeder en de Dochter [= ‘Also in the Name of the Mother and the Daughter’], Wilco, Amersfoort 2000. She died in 2010.

Tina meditation Past Present Future

past present future

NEW WOMAN – ME!  no 14

look at my profound heart-felt
aspirations
rooted in social and religious values
aiming at a happy future
for everything and everyone . . .

then look at the reality:
a rudderless humanity
in a neglected and violent environment

yet, with a right to life and to survival
for all —
so much remains to be done

dear man, will we together
take this task on our shoulders?

© Tina van Lieshout
translation John Wijngaards

Historical note. Tina was fighting for equality in the Church. At the same time she became keenly aware of the much wider issue of gender inequality on a global scale.  Many human beings still live sub-human lives. The natural world faces enormous challenges. She hopes that men and women can solve these issues together, with recognition of genuinely equal responsibilities. In her painting she depicts on the left Adam and Eve in paradise (the past), the couple in the middle still shows a dominant male (the present), the crows on the right are future generations.

MEDITATIONS

Tina van Lieshout was a Dutch Catholic woman who felt called to the priesthood. Her diocese refused her admission to the priestly formation programme which she challenged in high-profile court cases. She lost. Being both a gifted artist and poet, she described her despair in a series of paintings and meditations. But she also expressed through them her determination to realise her potential as a free and equal person.  Her work was published in the Dutch book Ook in de Naam van de Moeder en de Dochter [= ‘Also in the Name of the Mother and the Daughter’], Wilco, Amersfoort 2000. She died in 2010.

tina meditation I accuse woman

I accuse women

NEW WOMAN – ME!  no 11

 

we allowed it to happen
that men took charge of our earth,
we women allowed ourselves
to be robbed of our original task
by a lack of self respect and laziness
we women dethroned ourselves

we allowed it to happen
that we women naively played helplessness
we hid ourselves
behind the cloak of imagined inferiority

but the commission we received
has never been withdrawn
we, women and men, have to take charge
protect and maintain the earth
that was entrusted to both of us

© Tina van Lieshout
translation John Wijngaards

MEDITATIONS

  • the force of time
  • I accuse women
  • I accuse men
  • my inner struggle
  • past present future
  • my dream
  • and God saw that it was very good
  • phallus worship
  • on the way

Tina van Lieshout was a Dutch Catholic woman who felt called to the priesthood. Her diocese refused her admission to the priestly formation programme which she challenged in high-profile court cases. She lost. Being both a gifted artist and poet, she described her despair in a series of paintings and meditations. But she also expressed through them her determination to realise her potential as a free and equal person.  Her work was published in the Dutch book Ook in de Naam van de Moeder en de Dochter [= ‘Also in the Name of the Mother and the Daughter’], Wilco, Amersfoort 2000. She died in 2010.

tina meditation the force of time

the force of time

NEW WOMAN – ME!  no 10

as long as strange things
have not been mentioned by name
they seem unreal
as long as no one has heard of them
it is easy to deny them

when something has been thought over however,
when something has been spelled out and pinned down,
then the switch has been flipped
there is nothing that can hold the force back

years ago I started a whole new process –
time
grating grinding polishing time
now takes over from me

I am wondering what it will produce

© Tina van Lieshout
translation John Wijngaards

MEDITATIONS

  • the force of time
  • I accuse women
  • I accuse men
  • my inner struggle
  • past present future
  • my dream
  • and God saw that it was very good
  • phallus worship
  • on the way

Tina van Lieshout was a Dutch Catholic woman who felt called to the priesthood. Her diocese refused her admission to the priestly formation programme which she challenged in high-profile court cases. She lost. Being both a gifted artist and poet, she described her despair in a series of paintings and meditations. But she also expressed through them her determination to realise her potential as a free and equal person.  Her work was published in the Dutch book Ook in de Naam van de Moeder en de Dochter [= ‘Also in the Name of the Mother and the Daughter’], Wilco, Amersfoort 2000. She died in 2010.

tina meditation evolving identity

evolving identity

NEW WOMAN – ME!  no 8

I was
the wife of my husband
the mother of my children
more I could not be
I was a woman

I was
resigned to my condition
to my unused talent
more was not asked of me
I was a woman

but I am
one human being among other human beings
I have my own task
I can do so much as a human being
as a woman

yes I was
as God’s image a mother
a beloved partner and friend —
now a new woman has grown from my old self

 

© Tina van Lieshout
translation John Wijngaards

MEDITATIONS

  • the force of time
  • I accuse women
  • I accuse men
  • my inner struggle
  • past present future
  • my dream
  • and God saw that it was very good
  • phallus worship
  • on the way

Tina van Lieshout was a Dutch Catholic woman who felt called to the priesthood. Her diocese refused her admission to the priestly formation programme which she challenged in high-profile court cases. She lost. Being both a gifted artist and poet, she described her despair in a series of paintings and meditations. But she also expressed through them her determination to realise her potential as a free and equal person.  Her work was published in the Dutch book Ook in de Naam van de Moeder en de Dochter [= ‘Also in the Name of the Mother and the Daughter’], Wilco, Amersfoort 2000. She died in 2010.

Tina meditation irrepressible energy

irrepressible thrust in me

NEW WOMAN – ME!  no  6

out of the security of my small little world
I was rudely shaken and woken up
irrepressibly a thrust flamed up in me
to understand myself anew

imprisoned in the chaos of my fear
I had to free myself from my own self
so chained as I was to people around me…
I had to be free for
he/she–who-is

I, so chained as I was
at my roots and crown

© Tina van Lieshout
translation John Wijngaards

MEDITATIONS

  • the force of time
  • I accuse women
  • I accuse men
  • my inner struggle
  • past present future
  • my dream
  • and God saw that it was very good
  • phallus worship
  • on the way

Tina van Lieshout was a Dutch Catholic woman who felt called to the priesthood. Her diocese refused her admission to the priestly formation programme which she challenged in high-profile court cases. She lost. Being both a gifted artist and poet, she described her despair in a series of paintings and meditations. But she also expressed through them her determination to realise her potential as a free and equal person.  Her work was published in the Dutch book Ook in de Naam van de Moeder en de Dochter [= ‘Also in the Name of the Mother and the Daughter’], Wilco, Amersfoort 2000. She died in 2010.

Tina meditation male and female

male and female

NEW WOMAN – ME!  no 4

 

from where emerged that vision
of the superiority of the male?
on what ground did he claim the privilege
of dominating the whole of creation?
who granted him the right?
who gave it a name?
who knows the reason why?

from where arose that vision
of the inferiority of the female?
on what did she ground her duty
to be subservient to the man?
who imposed this obligation on her?
who gave it a name?
who knows the reason why?

from when I was young I learnt the vision
that people are marked to be like God
that it was God’s breath that aroused their love
through which they equally share the privilege and duty
of caring for creation; of preserving life
is this not the task God imposed?
was it not God who enabled us
for us to act as one?
is that the reason why?

© Tina van Lieshout
translation John Wijngaards

MEDITATIONS

  • the force of time
  • I accuse women
  • I accuse men
  • my inner struggle
  • past present future
  • my dream
  • and God saw that it was very good
  • phallus worship
  • on the way

Tina van Lieshout was a Dutch Catholic woman who felt called to the priesthood. Her diocese refused her admission to the priestly formation programme which she challenged in high-profile court cases. She lost. Being both a gifted artist and poet, she described her despair in a series of paintings and meditations. But she also expressed through them her determination to realise her potential as a free and equal person.  Her work was published in the Dutch book Ook in de Naam van de Moeder en de Dochter [= ‘Also in the Name of the Mother and the Daughter’], Wilco, Amersfoort 2000. She died in 2010.

Tina meditation me broken in pieces

me broken in pieces

NEW WOMAN – ME!  no 3

 

as cascading heavy snowflakes
disturbing thoughts cover the floor of my being

I am struck down
with a broken image of my church
with an attempt to be heard that is doomed to fail
with feeling paralysing injustice
with light without warmth
and life without structure

my God, where shall I turn?

© Tina van Lieshout
translation John Wijngaards

MEDITATIONS

  • the force of time
  • I accuse women
  • I accuse men
  • my inner struggle
  • past present future
  • my dream
  • and God saw that it was very good
  • phallus worship
  • on the way

Tina van Lieshout was a Dutch Catholic woman who felt called to the priesthood. Her diocese refused her admission to the priestly formation programme which she challenged in high-profile court cases. She lost. Being both a gifted artist and poet, she described her despair in a series of paintings and meditations. But she also expressed through them her determination to realise her potential as a free and equal person.  Her work was published in the Dutch book Ook in de Naam van de Moeder en de Dochter [= ‘Also in the Name of the Mother and the Daughter’], Wilco, Amersfoort 2000. She died in 2010.

tina-draft

three minds in me

in me lives a hunger for higher things
for belonging and infinity
in me I experience, in spite of my humanness,
the warmth of an attentive power
in mutual connectedness

in me rise feelings and values that struggle
with norms and rules of tradition and law
I note in myself, born from growing self-respect,
rebellion and aggression about my womanhood denied
by male distrust

in me grows hope–filled confidence
that the human spirit will prevail
I see my changed mentality
as basis of an equal future for women and men
and mutual respect

broken in pieces

as cascading heavy snowflakes
wild thoughts cover the floor of my being
I am saddled with a broken image of the church
with an attempt to be heard that is doomed to fail
with paralysing injustice
with light without warmth
and life without structure
my God, where shall I turn?

tina’s meditation 1

desert journey

NEW WOMAN – ME! meditation no 1

departing from a nameless void
not knowing where they travel
women of today seek
their own structures,
their own identity

nourished by the fire
of an awakening sense of self
yet hampered by ancient cultural roots
women test their dreams and ideals
“how can we be fully human and fully woman?”

© Tina van Lieshout
translation John Wijngaards

MEDITATIONS

  • the force of time
  • I accuse women
  • I accuse men
  • my inner struggle
  • past present future
  • my dream
  • and God saw that it was very good
  • phallus worship
  • on the way

Tina van Lieshout was a Dutch Catholic woman who felt called to the priesthood. Her diocese refused her admission to the priestly formation programme which she challenged in high-profile court cases. She lost. Being both a gifted artist and poet, she described her despair in a series of paintings and meditations. But she also expressed through them her determination to realise her potential as a free and equal person.  Her work was published in the Dutch book Ook in de Naam van de Moeder en de Dochter [= ‘Also in the Name of the Mother and the Daughter’], Wilco, Amersfoort 2000. She died in 2010.